You’d never mistake Luis Flores for Ashton Kutcher. Mila Kunis never drops by, much less the paparazzi.
But that didn’t stop the Orlando, Fla., teenager from staging his own “Two and a Half Men” celebrity takeover last May — or receiving three and a half years in the big house last week for attempting to obtain and abuse the American Express cards of Kutcher and other A-Listers.
According to court records, AmEx alerted the FBI in Orlando last spring after a caller claiming to be Kutcher provided the personal information and answered the security questions necessary to gain access to the actor’s account. Once in, Flores substituted his Social Security number and address for Kutcher’s, then ordered a replacement card, which AmEx shipped overnight to the new address on file.
Flores allegedly pulled the same celebrity takeover on the AmEx accounts of Kim Kardashian, Kris Jenner, Paris Hilton and disgraced former Penn State football coach Jerry Sandusky, tapping Jenner for $71,000 and Hilton for $5,000.
He even attempted it on FBI Director Robert Mueller. If I were looking to commit identity theft, Robert Mueller would be on my bottom three list. That’s just me.
But Flores apparently embraced a challenge. During the investigation, the FBI searched his flash drive and found Socials and other personal data for U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder, Vice President Joe Biden, first lady Michelle Obama, Hillary Clinton, New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, Microsoft founder Bill Gates, singer Beyonce Knowles and Mel Gibson.
It turns out Flores started small, having been terminated by AT&T for hacking its personnel files and diverting his co-workers’ direct deposit paychecks into his personal account. No record of whether cake was served at that farewell party.
Faced with 42 months in the slammer for credit card fraud and aggravated identity theft, Flores owes AmEx one last call: To update his contact information to Florida State Prison, cell block 412-D.
And go ahead: use your Kim voice.