I’ve been thinking about robbing a bank.
Well, not literally. For that, you’d need something faster than a minivan, more threatening than a golden retriever, and a getaway crew you could trust not to punk you at the curb, bag in hand, while they post the video to YouTube. And frankly, I don’t look good in stripes.
It’s the bank robbery process I’ve been pondering, not the act. And the process has taken a very interesting turn in recent years, thanks to a Stony Brook, N.Y., research firm called Applied DNA Sciences that’s giving cash something it’s never had before: an identity.
I’m feeling all George Bailey this morning as I ponder my interview yesterday with Kirsten Grist, author of “The Lost Bank,” her chronicle of the rise and YouTube-worthy face-fall of my once and favorite bank, Washington Mutual.
But despite missing WaMu, I’ve adapted, if not quite warmed, to Chase. They’re trying to be more like George and less like Mr. Potter. They’re trying to please me, and trying counts for something.
Here’s the best heartwarming ending I can muster: Now every time the drive-through bell rings, my golden retriever gets his treat.
I’m glad I’m not a Bank of America customer. Apparently BofA is testing yet another new set of fees to boost its sagging revenues, according to the Wall Street Journal.
It’s not necessarily the fees that bother me the most about BofA, it’s the size of the bank. It’s too big. And the bigger the institution, the more impersonal the service and, more importantly, if the bank isn’t doing well, too many people can get caught in the crosshairs.
Would you lie to your bank if it meant protecting yourself from identity theft?
Although some cardholders indicate they would stretch the truth to keep themselves safe — telling the bank a credit card was lost or stolen when, in fact, that wasn’t true — lying could actually end up hurting you, experts say.
Does legendary pro athlete Bo Jackson know banking? A recent profile on LostLettermen.com reveals the 48-year-old former NFL and MLB player is a co-owner and director at a small community bank in suburban Chicago.
What he does bring to the table is his popularity and marketing appeal as a pitchman. The bank’s website features a prominent picture of Jackson. Smart move.
It’s risky business opening a bank in the kind of economic climate we have today. Banks larger than Burr Ridge fail every week. But then, they don’t know Bo!